I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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