I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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