No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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