lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
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his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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