walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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