are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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