We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize