he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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