If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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