I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
There's always time for handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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