I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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