Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
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Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
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Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
FUCK WHALES
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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