Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
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