it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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