JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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