ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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