Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As shirtless as possible
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize