I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
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