my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize