So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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