girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
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He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
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I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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