We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize