I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
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