dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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