Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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