Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Randomize