Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
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imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
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Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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