Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
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I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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