so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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