If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
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Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
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High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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