Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps bees of course he's weird
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize