my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
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The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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