one might say we're banned from that church
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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