So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
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he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
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I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
The power of my boobs compel you
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
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