the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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