So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize