Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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