hotel room ftw
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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