Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize