My first STD was from a foam party
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize