Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
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