i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize