just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Randomize