The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the prime rib incident all over again
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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