i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
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