I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
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