I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Your dad touched me again.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize