Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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