Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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