His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
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btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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